Translation Check by Chrouya
Script: HDxD 08[edited].ass
Workraw: dxd08wr.avi
* Asterisks implying comments*

14
I thought you were just a helpless kid being proud of his sexual desires, but...
*doushiyoumonai = helpless*
*skirt chaser seems viable in this sentence. I took the literal translation though.*

21 till 24
*Maybe you could extend the translations of the vow*
"sono sukoyaka naru toki mo
 yameru toki mo
yorokobi no toki mo 
kanashimi no toki mo" is all I could hear, so

Young lad, vowest thou that thou shalt protect her in healthy times...
but also in times thou shalt become sick...
in times when thou art happy...
but also in times when sadness falleth...
*I thought using archaic English is funny here*

34
I've long been trying to get in contact with you...

35
But as you probably were too weak,

36
my voice wasn't able to reach you.
*using a more literal translation here, to avoid sentence splicing*

60
So, my friend, I was wondering,
*punctuation is nice*

76
*maiden is better than virgin in this case*

81
*Miru-tan it is. Also, I apologise for writing Miu-tan back in episode 6*

113
I've already shown them to you countless times, anyway.
*in fact, the sentence is reversed. Anyway, it's about showing the breasts; so here we use them.*

115
W-well, that's true, but...
*So you can't use "I have" in this situation*

126
*(Interesting, I wonder how many people know "bar" stands for "except", as I didn't know on the spot)*

145
And within the club, I'm referred to as "President".
*Context error, as Akeno said "Rias" 3 lines before. *
*Alternatively you can translate it as "I'm called the "President"".*

150
I'm being scorned by Koneko-chan now...
*~shi implies a continuation of the sentence ==> ...*
* If you prefer posh English, use this sentence instead*

151
Don't I have any good points...?
*I guess "I suck so much" isn't bad, but not a literal translation*

169
Interacting in the bath,
*again, punctuation.*

184
*just a comment, but maybe "exorcise" is a fitting word for /killing the demon with prayers/*

208
*I love your comments HeavenlyArmed xD*

226 and onwards
Sussex = Sirzechs
*using the wikia fanbase for the character names*

240
*totally correct translation*

271
Is he a weapon of mass destruction?!
*lol Ultima weapon*
*although "a weapon of mass destruction" doesn't sound bad as well*




*and here I thought I was TLC'ing anime, until I see some H scenes in this series...*